Are you concerned you or someone you know is a Domestic Abuse perpetrator?

Anyone could be a perpetrator of Domestic Abuse...a wife, husband, or partner, a mother, father, son or daughter, a relative through marriage or a current or ex-boy or fact it is anyone who is a family member or someone you have had an intimate relationship with. So the list of those who could be described as a perpetrator or abuser can be a long one.

Domestic Abuse is something that is said or done that hurts another person either physically, emotionally, sexually or mentally. It includes both physical and non physical behaviour, so as well as physical violence it includes emotional, psychological, sexual and financial abuse too.  Incidents of any or all of these forms of abuse could happen occasionally or frequently, and there is often, but not always a pattern of incidents.

Domestic abuse can ruin a life, don't let it be yours! Get help.

Looking for a local Perpetrator Programme?

The Bedfordshire Change Project is a community Domestic Abuse prevention programme for men (and women) who want to change the way they behave in their relationships. It is run in Luton by Relate North Essex & East Herts who as part of the programme also offers support to all the partners (or ex-partners) of those who take part in the programme.

Completing the programme will enable an abuser to start taking responsibility for their abusive behaviour and will help them to acknowledge the effects that their behaviour has had on their partners, ex-partners, families and themselves. It will enable an abuser to start working towards changing their behaviour to improve their relationships.

You can ask to be referred to this programme if you are already working with one of the local services or you can refer yourself onto the programme by contacting 08453 727701 or emailing the team at The programme is other words the abuser has to agree to attend.


If you are concerned that you, or someone you know, may be an abuser, help is also always available from Respect, the national charity offering help and advice for domestic violence perpetrators (and concerned friends or family) to stop their violence and change their abusive behaviours. Their service is anonymous and confidential.

The Respect Phoneline offers confidential advice, information and support to help someone to stop being violent and abusive towards their partner. Call the freephone number 0808 802 4040 Monday to Friday between 9am and 5pm or email them at

The Freedom Programme

There is a Freedom Programme Online Course now available for both men and women who want to change their behaviour. 

The Online Courses are a combination of ‘Living with the Dominator and the ‘Freedom Programme Home Study Course’ for Women or 'How Hard Can It Be?' for men. They can be translated by Google into other languages.

To find out more you can follow this link to the Freedom Programme website.


Respect has the following leaflets which may be of interest to you 

Spot the Warning Signs: take a time out

Choose to Stop: for gay and bi men

Managing Jealousy

Bedfordshire Change Project

Bedfordshire Change Project is a community domestic abuse prevention programme. There are services for men and for women who want to change the way they behave in their relationships. The service is delivered in Luton and Central Bedfordshire but run by Relate North Essex & Herts.

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